Tuesday, September 28, 2010

Convoluted sports quotes (Panthers version)

As a sportswriter for almost 25 years now, I've always enjoyed collecting a good, funny or strange sports quote or two.

John Fox has one in my column today about the Panthers' 0-3 start, where he says: "We are what we are. And that is what I'm trying to change, so we are not that."

There have been others -- I quote another in the column from George Seifert, but I couldn't work in the one from the former NFL player, who, when I asked how he did what he did, said:

"You don't have to be a rocket surgeon to do my job."

Obviously not. Or a brain surgeon or rocket scientist either.

Fox had another one a couple of weeks ago that sounded almost existential. When talking about Matt Moore's concussion, Fox said: "Day-to-day means kind of where we're at today is where we are. And we'll take it day-to-day."

Um, right. If you've ever read Sports Illustrated's "They Said It" near the front of the magazine, it has one of these every week and they are always good. One of my favorites was when Shaquille O'Neal was angry at a writer named Sam Smith and proclaimed: "Sam Smith is an idiot. I-D-O-U-T -- idiot."

As for the intelligence of the athletes and coaches who say such things, I say you've got to give them a break. I can't imagine how many dumb things I'd say if there was a microphone in front of my face all the time.

I'll leave you with one more of my favorites, from Randy Moss. After being involved in a freaky play that resulted in a touchdown for his team and asked about its strangeness, Moss said: "It's just a once-in-a-lifetime thing that happens every so often."

Sounds like the odds of the Panthers winning a game anytime soon, doesn't it?

20 comments:

FOX-BLOWS-ALMOST-AS-BAD-AS-RICHARDSON said...

Fox needs his nads kicked, real hard. What an idiot. Contrary to what you and your fellow sportswriters think, I do not see Fox with a head coaching job anytime soon. His next job will be a D coordinator job in Cleveland or someplace like that. He is NOT well thought of outside Charlotte.

J said...

Great stuff!

But no one will ever top the greatest sports quote of all time - Bucs coach John McKay in 1976, when asked post-game about his QB running for his life all day:

"Well, we didn't block. But we made up for it by not tackling."

Anonymous said...

Believe you have missed the boat on this. The very best quote has to be "You Know". Why? because almost every professional college graduated or not NFL player and coach use it over and over and over and over and over.
I've counted as many as 50 in one interview. Hey you can't coach, tackle, block or catch a pass but at least you know how to use "You Know". Glad to see you use your education since you can't play or coach.

Anonymous said...

Id have some quotes too!!! Panthers suck and are always gonna suck with Richardson running the show!!!!!

Anonymous said...

I prefer McKay's other famous quote. When asked about his team's execution, McKay replied "I'm in favor of it."

Anonymous said...

1988 Charles Shakelford, NC State basketball player, being interviewed on local tv: "I can dribble with my right hand and I can dribble with my left hand. I'm amphibious."

Anonymous said...

One can only hope and pray the majority of sports fans in Charlotte will eventually get it and come to realize ... regardless of sport - it ALL comes down to money and whether the owner is willing to pay to win. Charlotte continues being walked on by worthless owners i.e., George Shinn, Bob Johnson, JERRY RICHARDSON - because we allow the same. Being loyal is respectable -- but being blinded by loyalty is foolish. Jerry Richardson writes the checks - or in his case, pockets the profits. This team is 49 million dollars UNDER the cap, hired an offensive coordinator fired from the Cleveland Browns ... trades away future draft choices like kid trading bubble gum, cut the number of scouting staff, did not budge on any free agents, and raised ticket prices. Furthermore, the "big cat" thinks himself too big, too important to do interviews or EVER interact with the loyal fans paying his bills. It pains me to see so many continuing to blame the wrong people. It is Jerry Richardson's team and ultimately, EVERYTHING - good and bad, is HIS responsibility. As for the "fat cat" himself - perhaps P.J. O'Rourke said it best -
“No drug, not even alcohol, causes the fundamental ills of society. If we're looking for the source of our troubles, we shouldn't test people for drugs, we should test them for stupidity, ignorance, greed and love of power.”

A perfect summation of the Panther's front office ...
STUPIDITY, IGNORANCE, GREED, and LOVE of POWER.

Until Jerry's pocketbook feels it - NOTHING will change.

Anonymous said...

my favorite quote from Shaq, while playing for the Olympics and in Greece, was asked by a reporter if he had visited The Parthenon: " Man, we went to a lot of clubs, I don't remember all the names"

Eric / Cat Crave said...

There is also the one from the 2003 season I believe, where one of Carolina's players -- perhaps Steve Smith -- said "We're gonna ride this horse 'til the wheels fall off."

Anonymous said...

Scott the quote "Rocket Surgeon or surgery" Was Intentional. At least when I use it!
It is the mix of Rocket Science and Brain Surgery(obviously), so you mix the 2 to put more emphasis on being Facetious.

Jim Hynes said...

I can dribble with my right hand and I can dribble with my left hand. I'm amphibious."

He must be dribbling a lot, if he has to swim in it!

Anonymous said...

The Panthers should promote their Director of College Scouting, Don Gregory! You know, he's the one who likes to get "full body" massages at Emerson Joseph when he's in town. You see, he's still stressed out because he's the one responsible for drafting Dwayne "the bust" Jarrett. Why should he get a free pass?

Anonymous said...

Anonymous said...
September 29, 2010 9:32 AM


Get a life you stupid idiot.

Anonymous said...

Why would an owner in the NFL want to win? The owners are going to share all the revenue anyway. Did you see the report yeaterday about the playoff team that lost 30 million by going to the playoffs. Why would you want to spend more money if you don't have to! The NFL is the biggest Sports Ponzi scheme and you the fan are the biggest suckers for supporting the NFL. The owners and players are still going to get PAID if they Win or Lose. Let repeat that statement, The owners and players are still going to get PAID if they Win or Lose. These teams are real similiar to animal hospitals. They prey off the people who love their animals the same way these NFL teams prey off the fans that love professional football. I hope there is a lock-out. $90.00 a ticket, $30.00 for parking, $35.00 for food, $25.00 for drinks, $75.00 for a jersey multiply that by 4 and you can see why people want to stay home. Do the math, it's crazy how out of control the NFL has become. The owners know if we don't show up than the money is coming out of their pockets. One more for you, the NFL Commissioner makes 9 million dollars a year. 9,000,000.00 dollars a year. That's why he is out there cleaning up the IMAGE of the NFL. He's set for life after working one year. We, the normal fans, will never see that kind of money in our life time. We should let these NFL people see what it's like working in the REAL WORLD.

Anonymous said...

Why would an owner in the NFL want to win? All of the owners share all the revenue anyway. Did you see the report yeaterday about the playoff team that lost 30 million by going to the playoffs? Why would you want to spend more money if you don't have to! The NFL is the biggest Sports Ponzi scheme ever created and you and I (the fans) are the biggest suckers for supporting them (the NFL). The owners and players are still going to get PAID if they Win or Lose. Let repeat that statement, The owners and players are still going to get PAID if they Win or Lose. These NFL teams are real similiar to animal hospitals. Animal hospitals prey off the people who love their animals the same way these NFL teams prey off the fans that love professional football. I really hope there is a long lock-out. $90.00 a ticket, $30.00 for parking, $35.00 for food, $25.00 for drinks, $75.00 for a jersey multiply that by 4 and you can see why people want to stay home. Do the math, it's crazy how out of control the NFL has become. The owners know if we don't show up than the money will be coming out of their pockets. One more for you, the NFL Commissioner makes 9 million dollars a year. 9,000,000.00 dollars a year. That's why he's out there trying to clean up the IMAGE of the NFL. He's set for life after working one year in the NFL. We, the normal fans, will never see that kind of money in our life time. We should let these NFL higher ups see what it's like working in the REAL WORLD.

Anonymous said...

@ Anonymous September 29, 2010 11:33 AM & September 29, 2010 5:21 PM,

Nobody is forcing you to pay for anything or watch anything NFL. If it bugs you this much, Move on for crying out loud. It's Entertainment!


And to Anonymous September 28, 2010 10:33 PM, leave Jerry Richardson alone. He's one of the greatest, if not best, sports owners around. If you were an owner, you would most likely have to do the same thing. There's no conspiracy, it's just business. Just at a higher level than we, the peons, will ever know. The Packers, Colts or Dallas, didn't become great over night! It took them years of changes and disappointment to become who they are today! Suck it up and drive on!

Anonymous said...

How bad is the anther organization when the owner, Jerry Richardson, fires his two sons at the beginning of last season and brings in a college athletic director to be the President of his team. He already has an ex- sports writer as his GM and a former high school coach as his Director of College Scouting. What's wrong with this blue print. DYSFUNCTIONAL WISDOM!

Anonymous said...

Panthers may have a chance to draft Andrew Luck if they keep up their non-winning ways.

Anonymous said...

The Panther's are not what we thought they were going to be this year! Keep buying tickets because one day we are going to be real good. We just need your money so we can pay ourselves and these million dollar baby athletes. It all starts with you the fan. So please spend, spend, and spend some more. The Richardsons need your support and your every dollar.

Anonymous said...

Hey Hurney, Please remove your head head from Mr. Richardson backside. It's real embarrassing!!